Learn to Fight, Learn to Give up

Published: 25th July 2010
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We are taught to fight for what we want and believe it, to not give up, to be strong. As much as we should be fighters, we should also learn that sometimes it's wise to stop and back off instead of pushing forward, because fighting until you drop is only a solution for boxers. In real life people who want to live a long, healthy and satisfying life need to know what is and what isn't worth fighting for, they need to learn to pick their battles and to give up with class.

As kids we argue and throw fits just to get what we want, for ours to be on top. That may work for a three-year old, but certainly not for a grown up. We're not always right, we don't always get what we want or think we deserve, and the sooner we realize that, the better. At the same time, if for example a teacher unfairly accuses us of cheating or boss blames us for messing up something that is not our fault, we have to stand up for ourselves and fight the injustice. The thing is, we can't start screaming and crying, but have to find convincing arguments that we can present in a calm, reasonable manner. If it works, great, and if not, let's think if it's really worth any drastic moves before we complain to the higher instance or quit.

Professional life is rarely a fight free one, but there are fights that can make us or break us, so before starting them, we need to be sure what it is we want. Fighting a coworker for a promotion, for example, is only worth it if we want the position and are capable of getting the job done, because if we just want to interfere with somebody else's promotion or get in the race because we're expected to, it's pointless. Also staying in a job we hate or feel completely unfulfilled in makes no sense at all and results in us suffering every day going in the insurance company office, when we really want to join the ranks of top couture designers. Only job we like and want to be doing for a long time to come is worth putting a real effort in to keep.

When we fight for a job we love, let's not forget about our health. Just because we're having fun doesn't mean we should be staying in the office until midnight, or take tons of work home. We have to stay within reason, because otherwise the fight will end up with us getting a heart attack or a serious illness. Wanting to be successful doesn't mean we should be killing ourselves to get on top, and saying no to an additional project doesn't mean we're weak and giving up. It means we know that the better we treat the body the better it treats us, so we can do a good job longer.

If we got into a situation that the fight hurt us, it really is time to reconsider. If the career chase gave us high blood pressure, maybe it's time to slow down, exercise more instead of calling up meetings and reconsider what is more important, the fight to be the boss or the fight to live. Because if there is one fight we should never toss a towel in it's the one for our health. If you're overweight, fight to drop pounds, go to the gym, join a weight loss program, change your eating habits, go for low carb bread. If you've got diabetes, get it under control with a doctor, exercise regularly, replace unhealthy foods with ones that keep your blood sugar in check, like vegetables, diabetes certified pita bread, lean meat and so on. After all, if you give up your job, you can always find another, possibly more satisfying one, but if you don't fight for yourself, what is there worth fighting for?

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